While reading Charlotte Perkins Gilman's, "If I Were a Man", I threw around the
hypothesis that not only does the mind control the body but the body in turn controls the
mind. This reminded me of an incident in my own life. I was 15 and in grade 10. My
sister was a year older and in grade 11. We'd just gotten our mid-term grades and
received the exact same grade point average as one another, 82.6, an A minus . My sister
had always been considered the smart one in the family and I felt like I had finally
equaled her in intellect. Being a fifteen-year-old male, however, made me continually
gloat about my sister's lack of superiority. "You're not smarter than me anymore. Soon
I'll be the smart one in the family." I said a least six times in ten minutes.
"Owen, look, we both know that I am much more intelligent and mature, at 16, than
you will be at any point in your life. "I'd finally got her to reply. I knew I could win this
argument. For the first time I'd not only proven her intellectual equal but I was going to
get to defeat her in a logical battle of wits.
"But we got exactly the same average. I'm gaining on you baby !"
"Oh, grades don't mean much. Besides you're a guy; it's way easier for a guy to get
good grades. My 82 would have been 92 if I only were a man." She'd thrown me for a
loop. I didn't want to get into a battle about sexism, but it was too late; I was stuck.
"Is not!" I finally countered, "And if it is easier for a guy to get good grades, please,
explain to me why?" There was no way she could explain it, I thought.
"Because guys are supposed to be dumb. Thats why when a boy shows any signs of
intelligence he is pampered and given excellent grades for very little actual work." I was

stunned. She didn't even need time to think and it made sense; all of my friends were
idiots, new teachers always treated me like an idiot for the first few weeks . I wasn't
going to back down though, I wanted to win this argument.
"You can't prove that!", I said unblinking and fierce .
"You just try going to school as me then.", OK, I thought. I'll do it . It would be
easy.
"You be me then. You won't make it past lunch."
So we both agreed to switch brains. We went into the kitchen and sliced open our
heads with the big heavy butcher knife. We stood there looking at one another with the
tops of our skulls removed and our brains exposed. Our brains were about the same size,
mine had more of a purple tint to it however. Intelligence must have something to do
with brain color, I thought. Then we simultaneously lifted our brains out and plopped
them into the other's skull. It felt cool; suddenly I blacked out and then I stood there
looking at me through my sister's eyes. We both laughed and then replaced our lids and
went to sleep early. "Big day at school tomorrow," my sister said. Easy day was what
I was thinking.
I woke up a little earlier than usual. I felt that I couldn't go to school looking like a
slob. I spent over an hour fussing with my new hair and struggling with makeup.
Meanwhile my sister's brain and my body were still asleep in my room. I decided to
wake her and me up . When I went into my room I realized, for the first time, that the
place smelt of dirty gym clothes and old sneakers. I didn't know how I could stand it. I
woke them up, my body and my sister's brain, and then went back across the hall to my
sister's room to get dressed. The underwear felt weird, uncomfortable in a way, but I
kind of liked it. I decided to wear jeans and a sweater. I looked all right. The hair and
makeup could use some work, but I felt I handled the eye liner and lipstick quite well,
considering my inexperience . My sister was dressed and ready to go in two minutes .
She'd just grabbed some clothes off my floor and threw them on; that's what I'd have done
had I been me.
We ate breakfast together and walked to school. When we got there we went our
separate ways: I to her math class and she to my gym class. In gym we were playing
basketball. I remember thinking, "I hope she doesn't embarrass me." Then I noticed a
group of guys looking at me the way I usually looked at girls; did they ever look like a
punch of idiots. I just smiled slightly as I walked by. Then I realized that an argument
would start, between the boys, over which one of them I was smiling at. I then quickly
walked to math class.

If I Were a Man, Oh, But I Am (continued)